In an article “Seven Keys to a Good Death”, Charles Garfield, a psychologist, writes what conditions are key to a good death. Photographs of key moments can produce honorable works of art to share for years to come.
How rewarding would it be to attain some of those key moments in photographs, invaluable pieces of art that honor a loved one? Capturing some of these key moments can allow the remaining loved ones to reflect on the “good” in a “good death” of a loved one and their part in it.
In this article, Mr. Garfield notes the number one key is to experience as little pain as possible. The medication that eliminates much if not all that pain is definitely a key. The medication that gave your loved one relief of physical suffering that is relevant to a good death and can be represented in photographs that will give you peace in knowing that your loved one was comfortable at the end of life. He also mentions the spiritual pain. A discussion of great importance and shared connection at the end of life can be depicted in a somber yet sincere photograph, showing the deep compassion and inner peace. A photograph can depict the shared connection at the end of life which can alleviate some of the spiritual pain experienced at the end of life,
He further states that recognizing the importance of psycho-social pain. Ira Byock wrote in his book, The Four Things That Matter Most, that there are four basic messages a person needs to communicate at the end of life:
“I love you”
“Thank you”
“I forgive you”
“Please forgive me”
No value can be placed on capturing those re-connections/resolutions. Photographs are tangible evidence of those resolutions, which can allow for good lasting memories for the living and the dying, instead of the looming despair of unresolved issues.
Satisfying any remaining wishes is also key in Mr. Garfield’s article. Some people want to live long enough for a special occasion or to see someone special. But be careful that these are the patients wishes and not of another. It is the PATIENTS wishes that are relevant. A photo that attains that moment of satisfaction is a work of art that will be cherished for years.
A review of their life meaning is another key necessary for a good death according to Mr. Garfield. Photographs of various achievements and connections with others can create a legacy that lives on and is a visible validation of a meaningful life that is worthy of recognition.
you can read the Mr. Garfield’s full article here: https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/seven_keys_to_good_death
What are some of your keys to a “good death”? Discuss these with a trusted friend or loved one now while you have a chance.
Best wishes
